Gordon probably worked his shift as night manager at the Butte KFC/A&W Combo Restaurant in Butte for as long as any of the other night employees could remember. As far as they were concerned, he was as permanent as the mute Colonel Sanders statue sitting on a park bench in the corner of the restaurant, one arm hung over the back of the bench inviting wayward fast food connoisseurs to take a seat and a photo to prove their conquest of this particular hybridized fast food chain. Like the statue of Sanders, Gordon had been there since before they started working, and he would be there long after they had left. And like that fixture, no visitors have ever pulled out their cameras to pose with either of them.
Logan and I walked into this restaurant at nine o’clock. According to their dinky sign, they were already closed, but the door was unlocked. Gordon stood behind the counter, blue employee shirt bulging from his man tits and gut, wispy moustache curled into a lecherous smirk. He was staring at Heather’s chest as she stood trying her best to avoid his gaze. She had eyes too wide apart, but to Gordon, she was the primest piece of ass he had seen all week.
“You… want chili cheese on those fries?” he asked.
She shook her head. “No thanks,” she said. Her voice was shrill.
“They won’t cost ya nothing,” he leered. She didn’t know it, but Gordon, king of the domain of fried chicken and root beer floats was offering her his kingdom. He had not charm, nor looks, nor physique, but he had a whole vat of chili and cheese he was willing to look the other way for.
I was up at the counter but he was looking at her still. I started to order, but was interrupted. “What’s your major?” he asked.
“Biology.” She kept her responses curt. He conducted a mammogram with his eyes.
Another employee plopped the bag of food she had been waiting for. She grabbed it and turned to leave.
“Come back and visit us, real soon,” he said. “Don’t get too mad at us or nothing.” She had already gone.
Next time, just take my goddamned order, Gordon.
Pretty hilarious.